Be here now
for Djuna Croon and Jessy Cerritos
Embracing the silence...
Embracing the potential of perception of tiny details...
Embracing all that is given to you in this very moment...
Instead of trying to fight it...
If the image is blurred...
Are you dissatisfied?...
Why?...
Maybe you can try to find something in it?
Maybe it is something about your necessity of perfection?
How about this?
Maybe it is something else?
It is only you, who creates meanings or lack of meanings in your life, after all. It is one of the lessons. We should take the responsibility for our reality-crafting. However, this doesn’t mean that we shall become lonely. The beauty of fine-crafted art is a suggestion of a possibility of exchange and playing together.
Always adapt the level of symbols which you use to your own skills, your own needs, your own processes. Don’t try to copy-paste someone else’s symbolic system. People usually don’t appreciate the power of their own minds enough. They are stuck with necessity of repetition of specific configurations of concepts. Try to just play it out. Be foolish, be wicked. Allow yourself to be vulnerable and free in creating the concepts.
But concepts are not enough. You need to have your clear heart speaking through them. If you just play with concepts, without allowing your heart to be, there would be no meaning in it, and this will be like a game of empty shells, the crushing grudge, crushing feeling of devastation.
It is very important to let your heart speak though your actions, through your body. You will find your own meaning by yourself, your own language, your own concepts. Just allow yourself to become patient, to become the monk of something stronger than religion: the monastic practice of reloving, regaining spiritual strength.
Sometimes you can use some tools, some concepts, or substances. But you should be very gentle with what type of stuff and how you are going to use... Because maybe there are more strong ways of becoming free from your shackles, without keeping yourself in the fight for releasing yourself from the shackles... Maybe part of the ego is precisely the belief that you have figured the right path of freeing yourself from the ego? Who knows... Nobody will tell you how to heal yourself, because the very essence of healing is regaining your own strength, through trusting again your own intuition, trusting your own heart. Don’t let your mind lie to your heart. Let them dance together in love towards yourself and towards others. Love that listens to yourself and to others.
The necessity of adapting oneself to the forms of communication that other people impose over themselves in order to run away from their own weaknesses and struggles can become an illness of heart. By becoming genuine you also learn how to touch other people’s hearts. This is a very gentle process. You have to be very careful about this. The stronger you are, the more responsibility – for others and for yourself – you are taking on yourself. Don’t let your mind fool yourself. Your weakness is always your strength. Remember about humbleness. Striving for perfection is a seductive trap.
If you want to struggle for anything, – struggle to be here, right now, hold on, be real, and let it go...
«Spiral out, keep goin’»*...
25.XII.2015, 182 Lisgar Street, Toronto
* James H. Keenan, 2001, Lateralus, in: Tool, 2001, Lateralus, Volcano.